Mackenzie is now about 2.5 months old, almost to the supposed magical 3 month mark. We have made the decision to try to maintain parts of our old life in our new life with a newborn. I believe we could stay home more often, have a “better” more reliable schedule and probably have it a bit easier. However we have decided to stay active and busy with Mackenzie along for the ride.
The best thing I did was join a mom’s group. There are about 10 moms/babies in my group and it right of the bat forced me to get used to putting Mackenzie in the car seat and drive with her. There were many days when Mackenzie cried and cried on the way to our meeting or outing and I told myself this was a bad idea, I should have stayed at home and not created this stress in our lives, although each time after I was so glad we did it. On top of that I have a community now. Our official group meetings are over so now it is up to the members to keep up outings. This week I offered for the moms and babies to come to our place. 5 moms and babies came over in a staggered fashion, not by plan, from 10am-2:30pm. I put out coffee and tea, we picked up take out, and we talked poop, sleep, wine, IUDs, psychology, told funny stories about our partners (I have a good one about Elliott goofing up the car seat buckles, but another mom topped that with how her hubby held the carrier, and another mom admitted to a run away stroller that took the cake), and we all agreed we have no idea why anyone would have another child - hence the IUDs (yes I got one)! Here is a picture of all of Mackenzie’s baby friends from our group’s massage day (Mack is on the end at the right).
I addition to the mom’s groups we get out every day to walk Shiloh. This is more by requirement than to find balance (I could hire a dog walker) although I am proud that we are able to be mobile. Last week we went for a family adventure and braved Point Isabel, a large walking trail and off leash dog park about 20 minutes away. I thought it would be ok to try during the week, during the day, as I expected less dogs so I hoped Shiloh wouldn’t go completely crazy, and he didn’t, he ran and ran although was overall really well behaved and came when called. Mack was a gem in the carrier and slept the entire time. I considered it a huge success. Although I have to say it was still a bit boring not having anyone to talk to on our walk so I think I will try to organize meeting a mom or two there in the future. Today the whole family repeated the same adventure and it went less well. Mack wouldn’t sleep in the carrier and Shiloh was a bit crazier with many more dogs. However with the two of us we managed, although with a fair share of stress. Here are a few pics from our trip today.
It doesn’t come through in the picture but the Golden Gate Bridge is visible from here on a clear day and it is just a beautiful setting.
In addition to this we have also tried to go out and stay social. So far I got out to do yoga with our neighbor and her friend who owns a yoga studio in D.C., it was awesome. I went to a holiday dinner for CREW one night while Elliott watched Mack, I drank a whole glass of wine, bid on silent auction items, and had dinner with adults and it was glorious. We went to Rowan’s 1st birthday party in San Jose, a 45 minute car ride, our longest yet, and had a great time. We saw Hugo in the movie theater with 2 other couples from our mom’s group at a theater in El Cerrito where you can bring your baby, the movie was great, we had burgers, sweet potato fries, wine and beer and Mackenzie barely fussed. Elliott has been out for drinks with his coworkers. We have been on two or I think actually three hikes, two with friends. Mackenzie and I went to mom and baby yoga this week at 7th Heaven, that is a blog post all its own, and we had a great time. And we went to Elliott’s company’s holiday dinner party last night, don’t we look great!
Wow I have to say while the 10 weeks have gone by fast we have done a lot. Writing it all down like that makes me really proud. However the thing is, its been a bit hard. Mackenzie’s eyes were open at 11pm last night, something I haven’t seen for weeks (we go to bed at 8pm and she sleeps pretty consistently for 5-6 hours and then another 2-3). Today she is extra fussy, I am sure because she is more tired that usual. I think many families would make the very reasonable decision not to affect their sleep and schedule for a holiday dinner party with a 10 week old. For us though it seems right. So yes, actually all of us are a bit fussier today as we are tired, but we had an excellent dinner, wine (more wine… seems like a pattern here), we scored a gift card to Chez Panisse in the while elephant gift exchange, we got to know some of Elliott’s coworkers better, and Mackenzie got to show of her awesome holiday leg warmers. I never thought I would be one to dress up a baby, but seriously there is so little joy in raising a newborn dressing them cutely is a pretty good outlet.
I like to tell myself these outings provide Mackenzie with exposure to new things but lets be honest right now its purely for our benefit, as she gets older she will start to benefit from our outings too. So for now we are choosing tired, a little more crying and fussing, perhaps exposure to more germs in order to find balance and feel a bit more like ourselves. I hope our efforts makes us happier people and I am pretty sure that provides some benefit for little Mack.
